Book Title: THE SOMEWHAT WICKED WITCH OF BRIGANDALE
Character Name: Gretsella, the Witch of Brigandale with the Reasonable Prices
How would you describe your family or your childhood?
I would not describe them. A witch might not have hatched from an egg at the age of fifty, but she should always strive to give the impression that she did.
What is your greatest talent?
Anything that I choose to attempt.
Significant other?
Don’t be ridiculous.
Biggest challenge in relationships?
When people insist on doing what they think that they’d like to do, instead of exactly what I tell them that they ought to do.
Where do you live?
In the finest, tidiest, most pleasantly-scented cottage in the great forest of Brigandale. You may not see it.
Do you have any enemies?
If I do, they know better than to allow me to become aware of them.
How do you feel about the place where you are now? Is there something you are particularly attached to, or particularly repelled by, in this place?
It’s a pleasant enough place, if overpopulated by meddling prophetic forest creatures.
Do you have children, pets, both, or neither?
I have one son. His name is Bradley. He has a very symmetrical face and a kind and accommodating manner. I have nothing to complain about, as I don’t approve of men thinking too much. It overheats their blood and leads to outbreaks of geopolitics.
What do you do for a living?
I am a purveyor of only the finest quality spells, charms, potions, philters, unguents, amulets and minor hexes, at prices accessible to the middle-class homemaker.
Greatest disappointment?
Other people.
Greatest source of joy?
Myself.
What do you do to entertain yourself or have fun?
I invent interesting new curses, work in my garden, read the latest issue of Harridans Monthly, and rain calamity upon all who oppose me.
What is your greatest personal failing, in your view?
I don’t understand this question.
What keeps you awake at night?
Nothing. Insomnia is a condition suffered only by those who lack the strength and intelligence to simply attain unconsciousness.
What is the most pressing problem you have at the moment?
Being forced to respond to this tedious series of questions.
Is there something that you need or want that you don’t have? For yourself or for someone important to you?
I have sometimes considered that everyone would be better off if I was appointed universal ruler of everything.
Why don’t you have it? What is in the way?
The general populace lacks the good sense to realize that they would be much better off if I was in charge.
THE SOMEWHAT WICKED WITCH OF BRIGANDALE by C.M. Waggoner
A practical witch must sabotage her beloved son’s ascension to the throne in order to keep the kingdom from ruin, in this delightful cozy fantasy from the author of The Ruthless Lady’s Guide to Wizardry.
Once upon a time, a somewhat wicked witch named Gretsella lived in a cozy little cottage in the Dark Forest of Brigandale. She dispensed herbs and tinctures at reasonable prices, met with her slightly oddball coven on a regular basis, and had absolutely no need of any further company whatsoever, thank you very much. But then one afternoon, Gretsella came home to find a screaming infant on her doorstep.
Against all her better judgement, she took the baby in. She named him Bradley.
Eighteen years later, Bradley has grown into a bafflingly likable young man under Gretsella’s extremely tolerant—one might even say doting—eye. But the witch’s hopes for an unremarkable yet fulfilling life for her son are shattered when small woodland animals start prophesying that he is the lost prince and should ascend to the throne. Bradley ignores Gretsella’s advice that prophecies and talking chipmunks are to be avoided at all costs, and sets off for the capital. But soon confusion and chaos are reigning, and scheming courtiers are using Bradley for their own ends. Sometimes a witch has to roll up her sleeves and take matters into her own cauldron. So Gretsella resolves to bring about the downfall of her darling son…
Fantasy | Coming of Age [ Ace, On Sale: March 17, 2026, Hardcover / e-Book, ISBN: 9798217188239 / eISBN: 9798217188246 ]
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About C.M. Waggoner
C.M. Waggoner grew up in rural upstate New York, where she spent a lot of time reading fantasy novels in a swamp. She studied creative writing at SUNY Purchase and lived in China for eight years before moving with her husband to Albany, NY. In her spare time, she volunteers, performs kitchen experiments, asks if she can pet your dog, and gardens badly.
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